A Functional Replica Out Of Old Growth Mahogany

The Voice is a show I would never, ever watch. Beside my natural aversion to people singing, I enjoy my television scripted and performed by professionals. Who don't sing.

But, like every other damned thing in the universe, it is made better by the simple addition of Ron Swanson (to be fair, the video above is more like adding Cee Lo Green to Parks and Rec, but stay with me). It's true. You could write a recipe book, wherein every entry is simply naming a thing, adding Ron Swanson, and it is better. Lets try it out.

Swans + Ron Swanson =

Batman + Ron Swanson =

Turkey leg + bacon =

They call it a 'Swanson'

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About MR. Clark

Adopting the descriptor of "successfully unpublished author", MR. Clark began writing things on the internet in 2012, which he believed to be an entirely reputable and civilized place to find and deliver information. He regrets much.