Two Stories I Don't Care About

 Two news stories hit the web late last week that I haven't mentioned, and had no intention of doing so. And yet, here we are. One concerns GI Joe, and the other concerns The Walking Dead.

  
First, G.I. Joe: Retaliation was pushed back a full year for 3-D conversion. Two things: A) bullshit. 3-D conversion takes two weeks, tops. Many other films have done the 3-D conversion in far less time. Sure, it sucks, but 3-D always sucks. There hasn't been a single example of it that has made anyone, anywhere, go "yes, that was completely necessary. This film would have been unwatchable if I hadn't had to watch it though plastic glasses over my actual glasses, and a minor headache" Every review I've read over the past three years has ended thusly: "And don't bother to see it in 3-D, it adds nothing to the experience." Or there abouts. My money, the movie really sucks, and the studio doesn't want to completely embarrass itself in the middle of summer, so it pushes it to the dead zone of next March, where it can arrive and disappear without incident. 

And B) I don't care. I never watched the cartoon, never collected the figures, and thought the first movie was terrible. So, I'm not going to waste money seeing a sequel to a film I didn't like, starring a pile of actors I don't care for, in a story I have no emotional investment in. Congratulations Hasbro. Between this, Transformers, and Battleship, you've ruined the movie experience for another generation. 

Secondly, last week someone released the first picture of Michonne from the third season of The Walking Dead. She is, apparently, a character with a sword. I'm not going to post that picture here, you can find it yourself. You know why? Because The Walking Dead has thus far been an unencumbered mess that doesn't deserve to be considered good television. I've said so before. Now that everyone worth watching on the show has left to be in Frank Darabont's LA Noir (except Laurie Holden, who I expect to die in the first episode back and scoot on over to HBO), I'll be watching that show instead of this dreck.


Via Topless Robot.
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About MR. Clark

Adopting the descriptor of "successfully unpublished author", MR. Clark began writing things on the internet in 2012, which he believed to be an entirely reputable and civilized place to find and deliver information. He regrets much.

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