The Internet Just Solved Bigfoot

Bigfoot bothers me. So does the skunk-ape, and the yeti, and other cryptids that that sort. Because, to be perfectly frank, if they were real, we probably should have discovered them by now. The Rocky Mountains, like the swamps of Florida, are not the desolate, intractable regions of the world where super-fauna might actually live, like the depths of the sea, or the interior of the Amazon. The Rockies especially is a well trodden track of land, heavily populated and very well documented. So the idea that there is a mega-ape trouncing around out there is foolishness of the highest order. And yet, there are sightings of something meandering through the brush. Setting aside drunks, and folk who go out needing to see something, and liars, the ones who started the craze back in the twenties had to be seeing something out there that made them associate with old Native legends.

The above video is, aside from frustratingly having been filmed vertically, from New Jersey, where a homeowner caught a black bear wandering around the neighbourhood on it's hind legs. The internet's reaction to this has been "bear thinks it's people,' in keeping with all the other recent people-esque behaviour from bears, like hammock sitting, and slide sliding. But me, I looked at this video, and thought, "if I were in the woods, and saw that, I'd think Bigfoot." Watch the end of the video, where it ducks into the woods, and tell me that watching it through the tangle of branches doesn't give off a solid Bigfoot vibe. And when standing bipedal like that, a black bear can reach up to seven feet tall, in keeping with the standard Bigfoot dimensions.

It doesn't explain everything, but it doesn't need to. The legend of Bigfoot has grown in the telling, like the kraken before it. But if you strip away the bull that has built up around it by the insane and the desperate over the decades, a hiker seeing a bear walking like a person from a distance might be a reasonable enough place for a legend to begin. Its just a thought.

Via Gawker.
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About MR. Clark

Adopting the descriptor of "successfully unpublished author", MR. Clark began writing things on the internet in 2012, which he believed to be an entirely reputable and civilized place to find and deliver information. He regrets much.


  1. I think you have nailed it. Besides the "whack-a-doodles" and the "True believer" crowd who do not need reason or evidence to mould their beliefs. Bears are the likely culprits. With all the satellites in orbit watching the earth's surface every square inch of the planet has been photographed. No bigfoot. Logic and reason are in your favour.

    1. And points to you for use of "whack-a-doodles."